I have been following your journal and I love it too!
Regarding this last post I so know what you mean about all or nothing. That is a real problem with me that I need to work on. I need to see more gray and not so much black and white because it just doesn't work for me.
For instance.. I was doing ok - not good by any means but staying at the same weight, the minute I knew I was going to see Darrin for a program I started eating like there was no tomorrow. Last night I got weighed and I was up 5lbs!!
Its scary to say the least.
I will be starting my program on Monday and I am going to try and think like a normal person and not look at every thing as evil!! I am going to take it one day at a time and do the best that I can do without beating myself up daily. I am going to reach my goal hell or high water but in a sane manner. LOL! My husband always says I am compulsive when I get really focused.
Reading these posts really helps put things into perspective.
Thanks for sharing!!
Keep up the great work, I know you will reach your goal just from your hearing the conviction in your posts.
You can and will do it.
Re: All or nothing
I am pissed off I have just spend 30 minutes posting and the post disapeard
Anyway I try again Rena I use tsk,tsk,tsk on me too,but I do not wiggle my finger at me..I just roll my eyes . Isn't it funny how we have our special fat spots huh? My back is my leanest part,then abs,after that arms. My legs OMG They are stubborn like a Donkey Honestly,until I have veins popping all over my upper body my legs stay the same BTW Muesli is roasted oats in a bit of oil and some kind of sugar.You can have plain muesli or with nuts and fruit.You probably call it something else.
Wendy,glad to have you here girl As for you stuffing your face before seing Darrin Well that is absolutely normal,trust me. I do it everytime I have to go on precomp diet . It is like Panic...I am going to be hungry and no more nibbles etc....Looking forward to your updates too
Re: Aluschka and today journal entry
Aluschka, don't you hate when you've typed a chapter in your novel (we type alike ) and suddenly it disappears!?! What the heck????!!!
As far as the trouble spots - uuuuggghhhh...my entire body becomes a trouble billboard, forget about spot, when I gain weight. I am one who distributes my weight throughout, but there are bodyparts that tend to lean faster than others. Funny that you bring that up as it kinds of leads into my journal entry for today. Grab a seat...chapter begins now...
Last night I came home from an exhausting day. I had gotten up at 3:30 a.m. (yes, getting up an hour earlier now so I can down meal #1 prior to working out), worked out, off to work, picked up the kids, dropped 2 kidsoff at football practice, went to school open house for one, went to grocery store with 4-year-old (which I always avoid whenever humanly possible ), came home and made dinner for hubby and the boys, threw in laundry, helped with homework, cleaned up dinner mess, and finally headed to the bath before bed. When I was in the bathroom, I caught a glimpse of my arm in the mirror. Wait...was I halucinating because I was so tired or was there a bit of definition I just saw??? I decided to stop and take a closer look. I gave the reflection in the mirror a front bicep pose. Nope, not that impressive. Then I gave the reflection a right-side tricep pose. Hmmmm...a little something was coming through. I held that pose, turned my back to mirror so that I could see the back of arm completely, and fiercely examined the reflection....ugh...dimples. So discouraging. Although I could see some definition developing from the side, the back looked awful. I began visualizing how beautifully sculpted I had gotten my arms not so long ago. I remember wearing sleevless tops at every chance I got because I was so freakin' proud of those arms I had worked SO DARN hard to sculpt and build. My thoughts went back to a particular incident that I will NEVER ever forget. My hubby, the kids and I had gone to the mall one day. I was about 4 weeks out from comp day and we were walking through the crowd of people. We passed 2 young guys sitting on a mall bench. They must of been in their early 20's or so. Suddenly I heard one say, "Damn, now that chic seriously works out! Look at those arms." My husband kind of gave them a glare and I laughed it off to lighten his mood; but inside I was so ELATED to know that a stranger, who has never seen me in thier life, could tell, would take notice, that I was fit and actually worked to get to that condition. It was the littlest of things, but one of the biggest moments during my personal journey with this lifestyle and I'll never forget it!!! After remembering that last night, I took a good long look at those dimples in the back of my arms. They once were solid muscle with not a dimple in sight. I visualized my goals, I remembered the moments...and I said to myself, you will get back to that place! You can and will do this and now that you know the error of your ways, the aftermath of neglecting what you know works, there are no excuses to make. It is what it is, and what it is, is CHANGING!!!
This mornings workout included triceps, and let's just say, they'll hate me tomorrow!!
Re: Aluschka and today journal entry
Alushka and Rena - food...its such a love hate relationship isnt it!!!
That is soooo cool that someone noticed like that isnt it? I can't wait till I look like that. As for seeing some definition in the mirror, that is all the motivation anyone needs to keep going. That's sooo great, your hard work is paying off.
How do you function getting up at 3:30am?? What time are you hitting the bed at night? You are totally impressing the hell out of me there. I get up at 5;30 - 5:45 to get ready for work and I am usally toast in the afternoon and really have a hard time keeping focused. Of course I am sitting in front of a computer all day long and a little bit of boredom comes into play too.
Re: Aluschka and today journal entry
Rena, I absolutely totaly understand where you coming from about how you feel The thing is...the changes in body come slowly. We think that just because we worked our butts for 2weeks we should be lean...we check in mirror like 5x per day if we are any leaner then previous day I have learned my lessons...it is pretty brutally demanding to build nice lean physique and it is hard to maintain it At least for me But is is extremely easy to get out of shape Just one months of not clean eating and slacking in the gym I will have to put very hard three months into getting back where I was That is why I eat pretty strict all the time and stay below 15%.I was thinking the other day that our bodies can be like house...When you have brand new house all is nice and primo looking. If you do not do any maintenance on it it will detoriate over the years. And then it might take whole year to fix it up...you know major renovation,ripping stuff out,knocking old plaster of,new roof..you get the picture. But if when you got your new house you spend each week checking out for any damage etc. and fix it straight away it would never get that bad. Same with garden,if you keep weeding,trimming each week,you will always have nice garden. But let it go for a year and you have jungle that will take couple of months to tackle down Same with our bodies!!!Rena if you can try to block the mirrors out and do not look at yourself,do not pinch your fat etc...It can mess with your mind big time. Expect that this journey toward healthy lean body will be a battle And as you know even when you win at the end, you still get your butt kicked too You will have some fantastic days and some crappy ones.Your progres might stop and you will have to work even harder and your eating will have tighten. Most important is to keep going,cos it is all worth it!!! The thing is there is no such thing as diet only a lifestyle.If you go on diet you will loose weight,when you go off it you will pile it on simple as that So whatever keeps as trim and looking good that will be our lifestyle And remember scales can be cruel You might not see any changes and it might drive you nuts or be disapointed!!! Don't..I very often stay same weight for weeks yet I will be leaning out. You are building muscle while trimming your fat,so sometimes you might loose half a pound of fat,but at the same time build half of pund of lean mass
keep sweet,keep going and eventually those dimples will give up and go away
Re: Progress and thoughts
First, Aluschka, I want to address your last post in my journal. I love your thoughts! They always really seem to convey that you completely comprehend what it is someone has said or is feeling and I appreciate that about you. The analogy you used regarding the body being much like a new home, PERFECT analogy and as we are going into our 2nd year in our new home, the relation is so true! I even read your post to my husband. Everything you said I know to be true. I just have a battle with patience and the lack of. That is an area in which I am putting the most effrot into changing, which brings me to my Saturday weigh in....
The scale stayed the same this week. No change up or down, weight was exactly the same as last Saturday's weigh in. BUT, I was NOT disappointed because my measurements were all down! I wore a pair of shorts Saturday that 3 weeks ago I could not even get buttoned! Yesterday I put on a pair of yoga-type sweat pants that literally slid right off my hips. I had to keep pulling them up and finally changed because I couldn't keep the waist up.
This week is week #4 and I will take pics to send to Darrin so that he can see I have not just been spinning my wheels. I may or may not share them. I will decide that when I see them for myself. EEK! I will, however, get some pics posted Aluschka. I said I would and I will. It's just a struggle to find time to get online at home and I have to do that from home. Not able to do it from work.
Weekend was completely packed with activity! Really exahusted! I even overslept today. My body is an alarm clock. I do NOT use an alarm clock to wake everyday as I hate the annoying sound of buzzers. My body is so used to my a.m. routine that I wake up without fail at 3:30 a.m. Today I woke at 4:30 a.m. in an panic!!! I realized my body had not woken and I was totally late for my workout. I could feel my body needed to extra rest and sat there debating on whether or not I should try to get up and rush through my planned workout. Nope. Rushing will do me no good, so today is my rest day. Normally that is Wednesday, but today it will be and Wed. will be a workout day.
Oh...I gotta get to work, but one last thing. Sat. evening I went to a baby shower and got stuck sitting a table with a woman who lectured the whole table on why we should not eat meat and how we are all contaminating our children and such by eating meat. By no means am I trying to insult vegans or vegitarians, but this woman was too much. It was all I could do to hold my tongue. Her rant was brought on my several women at the table discussing their "diets" of choice. Needless to say it was a table full of mis-information in circulation.
Okay...work is so backed up and I must tackle that beast today!
I just read your journal entry for today - HA...and I said I was off to work...
Anyway, I try my very best to get to bed by 8 p.m. nightly. With football practice, I don't always make that, but hubby tries his best to help me on that note. If he is able to man football practice, then I leave early as practice runs till 8:30 p.m. If he must work late and cannot make football practice, then I am usually home and in bed no later than 9:15 - 9:30 p.m. All my friends and family know not to mess with my nightly routine. No phone calls, no door-bell rings, nada - or else!
As for your a.m. rotuine, it will take some work and getting used to, but you will notice that with a solid routine in place, your body will begin to adjust to your regime and work for you, not against you. My body is a walking alarm clock, waking each a.m. at the same time. The only time that falters is when my body is screaming for rest and I know when to listen. Yes, it will take time, but be consistent and you will see your body will adapt. With time, your body will want to get up and go without any hesitation!
Re: Wendy - Bed Time
I am sure i will be ready for bed by 9 tonight. I just cant picture going to bed any earlier. My son goes to bed between 8:30 and 9 on school nights and I usually read with him till bed then go pack my lunch.
Well, thats a worry for next week when schools back.
I think my schedule will be evolving a bit over the next month and hopefully by the end of Sept I will be in a good routine.
Sounds line you had a great 4 weeks!! You are working hard and seeing and feelilng results. It’s a great feeling when your clothes are loose on you and you can tell yourself that regardless of the scale numbers you you’ve still done well and have accomplished something. I have a bad habit of jumping on the scale in the morning but I have put it away till next week. I don't want to be come obsessed with it like I've been in the past!!
Well I better go since I am at work and I should be doing what I get paid to do not posting on this site!!
I hear you on the whole getting to be early with kids and a life. It's not easy, but that's when you have to buckle down and decide what you will MAKE happen!
As for "great" in this 3 weeks, well, the pictures will tell me more. As for my stats, just to give you some idea, I weigh roughly 20 more pounds than you. So now do you see why patience is something I have to really grasp here? Although I am very pleased with my progress and my level of committment thus far, I have a lot of work to do. For me, it will always be a challenge, but I KNOW it is the lifestyle I want to live for more reasons than just looking good.
I got rid of my scale a long time ago. We were not the best of friends. I only weigh on once a week. My true measures will be how I feel, how my clothes fit, my progress in strength in my workouts, and my bodyfat %.
Re: Wendy - Bed Time
Holly Molly..I will need half a day to read this and reply I will get back to you 2morow Rena LOL...phew you can be hectic you two
Hey Rena...thanx for the compliments about my understanding where people are coming from I guess it comes from my own experiences. I went through re-bound myself...not bad one,but it still was a shock to me and my system It took me a while to get back on track Plus I have been through a lot in my life..physical pain-hospitals,injuries,starvation(I was refugge) moving countries..well you name it So generaly I can relate to just about anything,been there,done that...LOL
Hey I am looking forward to those pics (when it happens ) Gongrats on your "Falling pants" Isn't it great when that starts to happen-yupiii!!! BTW I had to laugh about that vegetarian chick I could just picture it in my head...some people can be so full on and force their opinions on others See I am in a circle of yoga people,cos I am doing heaps of yoga.Majority are vegans or lacto/ovo vegetarians.But none give me hard time about eating animal flesh. I have tried to be vegetarian/vegan,but my body just shuts down. It is just not for me. Look I love animals...we don't even kill mouse in the house We have friendly mouse traps and once the mouse is cought unharmed I release it into garden.As for my animal products I support organic,free range,cruelty free roaming animals. I shop at this green place,dude is 60's ex hippie and he is pretty hardcore about the rules how the animal have to be treated. He is vegan himself,but supplies animal products.Anyway...I am side tracking...as usual
Hope all is sweet with you girl
Re: So, so tired today
When I woke today and looked at the clock beside my bed on the nightstand, I was almost certain my body had overslept. Nope. 3:30 a.m. on the nose! I lay there for a couple minutes realizing how spent my body feels, but also thinking I do not want to make my evening about making up a workout, so I got up. Some things, no matter how hard they are to get started, are just easier done if you tackle them head on.
With that said, I am looking forward to an evening of no football practice. I am going to be able to spend some quality time with the kids tonight and it is much needed. My oldest son, age 11, has entered middle school and his world is changing. Of course I am quite biased, but he is such a looker. He has girls galore calling the house and he is so very into being "the man" that I am afraid I may have problems I have never had to deal with. I was up late last night trying to have a "talk" with him about how very important academics are and how I understand how easy it is to get side-tracked, yada, yada... He has always been very strong academically, but thus far into the first nine weeks of school, I see the warning signs - grades are not at the top of his priority list this year. Seems his social status has become priority numero uno. I get so stressed over these things as I really want to see my children succeed in all areas of thier world - school, sports, and yes, socially. I'd like to think that we, as parents, have instilled in him the values and moral ability to always make good choices. In this day and age, you just never know what your children are going to be faced with and that gives me great heartache even when I know my goods are truly GOOD kids.
My nutrition is flawless. I am really quite proud of myself as this is a milestone for me to go nearly 4 weeks without a single fall off the wagon. Last night I even made my hubby and the boys an amazing mexican fiesta for dinner. I made burritos and tacos, yellow rice, and black beans with all the fresh fixins, lettuce, tomatoes, onion, fresh-made salsa, etc. It looked and smelled so good, BUT I did not have a single bite! Not even a taste of the seasoned meat. I asked hubby to give it the taste-test after I had seasoned it. It felt good to see their faces in suprise when they came home from football and saw the table set-up with food they haven't seen in awhile. My kids are so used to eating chicken-something, that they were down-right shocked I had cooked something else. I even sat with them at the table and enjoyed my protein powder and cottage cheese concotion. I was totally okay with that and so were they. We had a lovely dinner together even with the "dreaded talk" we had to have.
Aluschka, sent LA the pics to post. I am thinking they may be up today. I have to be honest with you...it was really hard for me to put these pics on display as they are truly disappointing. Looking at them reminds me how far I have come, fallen back again, and just how far I have to go. But...I did agree to post them, and deep down inside it fuels me to work harder. Eventually I will be posting pictures that display how hard I have worked to make some serious changes - not temporary changes or changes to get myself to a stage in front of a panel of judges - but lifelong changes in both my body and mind.
Just saying hi.
Rena, just thought I would drop in and say hi. Read through your journal, so I'll start keeping up with your journey.
You are very inspiring and I hope some of that can rub off on me.
Hey, speaking of dinners, last night we got home late and starving, Hubby wanted pizza, then chinese. So they ordered chinese food and I just made myself some grilled veggies and 3oz of lean pork. After dinner guess who was feeling gross and sick? hmm... the person who stuffed himself full of deep fried chicken balls!
I don't like chinese food anyways, as it makes me sick, but I felt so proud of myself that I stuck to my food plan.
I need to see those abs!
Reading through your journal, the one thing that really stuck with me was the comment you got from those guys. I can't tell you how much I want to look like I'm fit. I want someone to be able to look at me and just know that I worked my ass off for it.
When does school start in your area? We start after labour day weekend. My son is going into grade 6 this year and he will be 11 the end of November. I can total hear what you are saying. So far I really don’t have a problem but I really started noticing changes the last few months….he thinks he’s the “DUDE”. Your story though is really putting the fear into me now!! LOL! Its such a busy world anymore and its so important to be involved with what they are doing and spend time with them. I am sure your son is doing what every other boy that age is doing. Mistakes will be made but that’s all part of learning. At this point all a parent can hope for is that they do the right things with what we’ve taught them.
We’ve had our son in Tae Kwan Do for 4 years now and I find that its really a great thing. It helps keep him humble. Our TKD teacher is a great guy and really keeps the kids respectful and grounded and when need be humbled. Its mandatory for them to do the best they can in school in order for them to progress in class. They are required to bring in a signed form from the school saying they are respectful of others etc. etc.. We let him take this summer off and I am sure next week when he starts back it will be a shock to his system…but a good shock.
Anyway, if I keep typing Alushchka will never be able to get through all these posts!!
Quote:Anyway, if I keep typing Alushchka will never be able to get through all these posts!!
You are too funny, Wendy!
As for my son, he turned 11 in April. They started school on August 3rd. He is already into a "click" of what he thinks to be "hip, cool" kids. Since being inducted into the new click, I have noticed his grades are dropping. His behavior is fine. He has always been a very respectful and responsible boy - still even tells me if his friends say a curse word or something to that effect, as if it's shocking to him, which I am sure he does not show that in front of them. At the moment, we really have no problems other than the notice of his grades slipping below our standards. I just know in today's teen population, there are so many negative influences and I am trying to be pro-active in order to never have to be re-active. Know what I mean???? Young girls these days - SHEESH - they are far more mature than I ever remember being at this age!
My kids took Karate for 2 years and had a very similar experience it sounds like you have with your instructor. Our Sensai and Sempai (instructors) required the same sort of discipline checks and balances. I miss it. We only stopped Karate as we could not juggle it with tackle football and all of it's demands.
Is he your only child? You and I are very close in age. I just turned 34. After having 3 boys, I am still young enough to keep trying for that girl, but...yeah...no. Three is plenty for me to keep up with.
Re: So, so tired today
You do have your hands full with 3 boy!!!
Yes I only have 1 son. I always wish I had more but we waited too long and then it just got too easy so we just decided to leave it at 1. I feel like I have 2 most of the time because we alwasy have a friend or "rental kid" as we sometimes joke.
He is in basketball and TKD and its not too bad when you only have 1 to cart around.
I turned 35 in March so I guess we would be a year apart.
You are definitely young enough to go for the girl!!
I agree girls are waaayyy more mature now. In grade 5 my son was getting notes from girls saying " you are hot" etc..
Hot at 10 ..hmmm... Meanwhile my son really wasn't interested yet.
I will also be keeping up with your journal so hopefully we will work to inspire one another alike!
I happen to love Chinese, but yes, it does leave you feeling quite miserable. I applaud you for stricking to plan when it would of been really easy to just order something "quick" - especially getting home late and feelign starving. Way to go!!!
As for the "fit" comment - yes, a moment in time engraved in my memory bank forever. Would love to get back to that place again and all I can do is take it one day at a time. Each day is another step towards that goal.
Now keep the focus you had a last night's dinner table, do all things you've put to plan to reach your goal and you'll sure be hearing those "fit" comments you crave as you stroll down the Hawaii beaches in Feb.!
Awesome
Awesome Rena..I bow to you girl 4 weeks of clean eating..WOWZA...way to go!!! I am absolutly pathetic with strict eating..I keep sneaking stuff in..even if it is just a lick of the spoon or extra 2 nuts etc Plus I have not kicked my coffee habit as yet I have 2-3 cups of cappuccino per week..loads of froth and solid amount of cocoa on top!!! But hey my excusse is that at least I have it as part of my pre or post workout meal And on those days I slash my carbs from other meals down
Hmm Chinese..I love it. But I generaly only have stir-fry veg with chicken or beef. No fried food or sweet and sour I have one free meal per week. I used to go out to Indian restaurant-rich curry and naan bread,but swoped it for either chinese or nice lean beef fillet with veg
I have just spend 30 minutes posting and the post disapeard
Rena I use tsk,tsk,tsk on me too,but I do not wiggle my finger at me..I just roll my eyes
. Isn't it funny how we have our special fat spots huh? My back is my leanest part,then abs,after that arms. My legs OMG
Honestly,until I have veins popping all over my upper body my legs stay the same
As for you stuffing your face before seing Darrin
Well that is absolutely normal,trust me. I do it everytime I have to go on precomp diet
. It is like Panic...I am going to be hungry and no more nibbles etc....Looking forward to your updates too
I wore a pair of shorts Saturday that 3 weeks ago I could not even get buttoned! Yesterday I put on a pair of yoga-type sweat pants that literally slid right off my hips. I had to keep pulling them up and finally changed because I couldn't keep the waist up.
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