seashoregirl 
Cooper Crazy
(8/17/05 3:12 pm)
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The Courage Within- Chapter 6
The next morning, Harley saw Zach get on his school bus and dropped Jude off at preschool before heading to the hospital. Upon arriving on the 7th floor, she spoke to a nurse who informed her that breakfast was being served to the patients. She asked if it would be all right to go see the patient in Room 722 and the nurse agreed.
When she entered the room, she saw Gus with a full plate of breakfast in front of him, not eating it but instead pushing the food around with his fork.
“Hey there” Harley said in greeting as she took a seat in the chair by the bed. “Why aren’t you eating anything?”
“Take a closer look at this stuff they call breakfast and tell me if you want to eat it.” Gus replied in a caustic tone. Harley didn’t let his tone bother her and took a closer look. Sure enough, Gus was right…the food looked disgusting. The scrambled eggs were not fluffy and cold, the toast was burnt, and the bacon was undercooked.
“Have all the meals been like this?”
“Pretty much when doesn’t exactly help when you’ve lost too much weight and the doctors tell you over and over again that you need to gain it back. Hospital food is the best diet plan I’ve ever seen.”
“Ok…so what do you want to eat?”
“Why?”
“Why…Gus, do you really need to ask? I’m going to go pick up something that you will eat and bring it back here. If the nurses catch me, I’ll be in hot water but at least you’ll have some food.”
“No, not that, though I would be very grateful. I meant why did you come back today?”
“Oh Gus…look at me.” And Gus looked into her beautiful green eyes and saw the love there…the love for him…the love and the hope for the future he thought he killed in the wine cellar and the lying he did afterwards…that love was still there. “I came back today because I said I would. We are going to face this thing together and we are going to beat this thing together and then we are going to see where we go from there. You never have to feel alone again.”
“Together…I like the sound of that.”
“Good…now the more immediate concern…breakfast. What do you think you can eat? And please bear in mind that I know what you tend to eat for breakfast…the high in fat, high in cholesterol stuff…stuff that could give you heartburn. I think maybe you might want to ease into eating that again. Your stomach most likely won’t handle it well.”
“All right general. You’re tough. How about a chocolate milkshake from the Diner?”
“That’s doable. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Harley bent down and kissed Gus’s cheek before walking out the door.
***********************************************************
Ten minutes later, Harley had returned with the dairy treat. She sat on the bed next to Gus as he slowly drank it. He was about halfway through when the door opened and a man in a crisp white lab coat with a stethoscope around his neck entered the room.
“Well, it appears that someone prefers the Meals and Wheels Diner to this wonderful establishment.”
“Uh, Doctor, I’m sorry” Harley immediately claimed culpability. “Gus wasn’t eating the hospital food and I figured some food was better than none at all and my family owns the diner. It’s entirely my fault.”
“No need to apologize Ms…”
“Cooper…Harley Cooper”
“Ms. Cooper. For getting Mr. Aitoro to eat something, anything, you quite frankly deserve a medal. And unfortunately, I have eaten a meal or two from the hospital cafeteria and it’s nothing to brag about…nothing at all.”
“I’m glad you are so understanding. I have a feeling some of the nurses wouldn’t be.”
“I think that is a correct assumption. I suppose I should introduce myself. I’m Dr. Paul Jansen…an oncologist who is handling Mr. Aitoro’s case.”
“I’m pleased to meet you,” Harley replied as she extended her hand and shook Dr. Jansen’s.
“So Mr. Aitoro…how are you feeling today?”
“Not bad Doc…not particularly great…but not particularly bad. If I’m released today, I think I’ll be feeling a lot better.”
“I know that you are anxious to be released. Your fever is gone. You have been given enough fluids so dehydration is no longer a concern. But you are very weak. You have lost too much weight and with starting chemotherapy, you may become even weaker. It happens with some patients. I don’t mean to pry into your personal life. As a doctor, I have a policy not to interfere with my patients’ personal affairs. But I don’t feel right about authorizing your release unless I am positive that you will take care of yourself and I don’t think you can do that alone.”
Disappointment and discouragement were readily visible on Gus’s face as he asked, “So, I’m stuck here, aren’t I?”
“For the time being, I think it’s best. Perhaps, you could stay with your father or someone else in the family.”
“No” Gus said adamantly, almost to the point of yelling. “I will not live with my father. I’d rather take my chances on hospital food and battle-ax nurses.”
Harley had been sitting on the bed listening to the conversation between Gus and his doctor. She knew that staying here would ultimately do Gus more harm than good. He needed out of the hospital with people who loved him to help him in this fight. She knew what she had to do.
“Dr. Jansen, you don’t have to worry about Gus being alone and not taking care of himself. That won’t be a problem. He’s coming home with me.”
Though Gus desperately wanted to take Harley up on her offer, he didn’t want her to be uncomfortable or pushed into something when she wasn’t ready. So he gave her a way out. “Harley, are you sure? I don’t want you doing something that will make you uncomfortable.”
“Gus, I am completely sure and do know what I’m doing. You need to be with people who love you, and no one loves you more than me, Zach, and Jude.”
“Mr. Aitoro, as your doctor, I’m going to offer yet another piece of advice. Take the lady up on her offer. She’s your ticket out of here.”
“All right. I will” Gus acquiesced. “When can I be released?”
“The discharge papers should be ready by mid-afternoon. Is that timing suitable for you, Ms. Cooper?”
“Yes, Dr. Jansen” replied Harley. “I will pick up my sons before coming back here to take Gus home. But what about his treatment?”
“The standard course of treatment for lymphoma is chemotherapy which may be followed up by radiation. The chemotherapy can be done outpatient, either here at the hospital or at the oncology clinic across town. I have an office there as do a few other oncologists. Mr. Aitoro will have chemotherapy once a week for three weeks and then one week off. That will continue for six-months. Then we can do radiation if necessary.”
“Doctor, what about side effects. Do I need to stock up on baseball caps?”
“Well, you could lose your hair. But it is a myth that all cancer patients lose theirs. Chemotherapy affects every patient differently. Some lose a little bit of hair, some lose all, some lose none. Some patients have problems with their bones and joints requiring hip, shoulder, and/or knee replacements. Some patients have none of those problems. Thrush, nausea, and tiredness are additional side effects. I can prescribe medicines to help with the thrush and nausea and any pain that you may have.”
Harley was feeling a bit overwhelmed at all of the doctor’s instructions and treatment plants and just needed to slow things down a bit. Sneaking a quick peak at Gus next to her, she knew he was feeling the exact same thing.
“Doctor, is there anything else we need to know right this minute?”
“No, Ms. Cooper. I’m going to give you my card with my beeper number, cell phone number, office number, and home number. If you need me for anything, please feel free to get in touch with me. Also, here is a card with the time for Mr. Aitoro’s chemo appointment. Now, I’m going to see if the release papers are being processed. Take care both of you…especially you Mr. Aitoro.”
After Dr. Jansen left the room, Gus laid his head back on the pillow and closed his eyes.
“Gus…are you ok?”
“Yeah, I think so. I’m just anxious to get out of here and all that chemotherapy talk has me feeling uneasy.”
“It will be all right. I’m going to help make it all right…along with Zach and Jude.”
“Harley, I have to ask one more time. Are you really okay with me moving back into the house?”
“Gus, I am only saying this once more so listen up. I am really okay with you moving back into the house.”
“Yes sir” replied Gus giving Harley a military salute.
“I’ve got a few errands to run and then I’m going to pick us up some sandwiches and then I’m going to pick up the boys before coming back to take you home. Please rest up while I’m gone.” Harley instructed, grabbing her purse from the bedside chair and giving Gus a kiss of the cheek before heading out the door.
**********************************************
Later that afternoon, Harley went and picked Jude up from preschool and Zach up from elementary school. Zach and Jude thought it was just another day until she drove past the turnoff for their house and didn’t stop until she pulled into Cedar’s parking lot.
“Mommy…why are we at the hospital?” Zach asked.
Harley took a deep breath before answering Zach. She knew the news of Gus’s illness would be very hard for her sons to understand and process. She was an adult and was barely coping herself.
“Ummmm…I’m going to tell you. Zach…do you remember a few weeks ago after we said prayers and you thought something was wrong with Gus?”
“Uhhuh…” Zach nodded his head and his lip began to quiver. He knew something was wrong…he just knew it. He felt like crying, but didn’t want Jude to see, because then Jude would start crying. Being a big brother was a big responsibility and one that Zach took very seriously.
“Well, you were right. Something is wrong with Gus. He is sick with something called cancer. Actually, what he has is also called something else, but it’s a very big word that you won’t understand and don’t need to understand.”
“What is cancer Mommy?”
“Cancer is something that people get inside their bodies sometimes and it affects people in all different kinds of ways. Your sister had cancer when she was a little girl.”
“But Lizzie is all better now. Does that mean Gus will be too?”
“Oh, Zach sweetie…I hope so.”
“He’s in the hospital, isn’t he? That’s why you brought us here.”
“Yes, Zach…Gus is in the hospital and I did bring you to see him, but I also brought you for another reason. We’re going to take Gus home.”
“With us?”
“Yes, with us. Gus needs to be around people who love him and nobody loves him more than we do…right Zach?”
“Right Mommy”
“So, we’re going to bring him home and we’re going to make him better. The doctors will do their part and we’ll do ours.”
“Kiss him better Mommy!” piped up Jude from his car seat.
“Do you think that will help?”
“Sure Mommy” answered Zach. “That’s what you always do when me and Jude get sick.”
“Well, I will have to try that. And you know what else you and Jude can do to help Gus?”
“What”
“You two can make sure to really listen and do what either I or Gus say. Don’t go to Gus when I tell you to do something and don’t come to me when Gus tells you to do something. Gus is very weak and he doesn’t have to energy to get in the middle of squabbles and I’m going to be taking care of him and you two so I won’t have it either. And also, when you and Jude are playing with Gus, it can’t be wrestling like you used to do. Gus doesn’t have the energy for it, but won’t want to tell you two guys ‘No’ so it is up to you not to do it.”
“But why won’t Gus feel like playing that way Mommy?”
“Well, because he is sick and the medicine he will be taking is going to make him very tired. You know how when you are sick, you don’t feel like playing very much.”
“Yes” Zach responded.
“Well, it’s kind of like that with Gus.”
“But Mommy…what if we forget and mess up? Will that hurt Gus?” Zach wanted to do his best for Gus…he really did, but he was a little boy and little boys sometimes forgot stuff.
“Oh, honey…if you forget, I’ll remind you again. I know that you and Jude wouldn’t mean to do anything that would hurt Gus, or me, or each other. Now, let’s go see Gus and bring him home.”
Zach and Jude held onto Harley’s hands as the three of them walked from the car, into the hospital lobby, and up the elevator to the 7th floor. When they reached Room 722, Harley knocked on the door.
“Gus…you have a couple of little boys who want to see you. Can we go in?”
“Sure, come on in.” As soon as Harley opened the door, Zach and Jude ran to the bed and hopped up beside Gus. Having traded in his pajamas for a black t-shirt, which was at least one size too big, and jeans which would have fallen off without his belted pulled as tight as it could go, Gus looked ready to leave the hospital.
“Hey Gus did you miss us?” “Mommy said you are coming home with us!” “Will you read us a bedtime story?” “We love you!” Zach and Jude were talking so fast that they barely had a chance to take a breath.
“Whoa there little guys…slow down.” Gus instructed. “Yes, of course I missed you. Yes, I am coming home with you and Mommy. Yes, I will read you a bedtime story. And yes, I love you very, very much!”
When Zach and Jude threw their little arms around him in a group hug, Gus felt like he was the luckiest man in the world. It didn’t matter that he had cancer. It didn’t matter that the past seven months of his life had been hell without Harley. What mattered was that Harley, Zach, and Jude still loved him. That love could help him through anything.
“All right my three guys. Let’s get out of here. Gus, do you need to lean on me?”
“Yeah, Harley…when we get out to the car, I probably will. But I think they are going to make me ride out of here in a wheelchair.”
“Oh…ok. I guess that makes me your chauffeur. Do you have a bag of stuff to take home?”
“Yes, my clothes are in the duffel bag on the chair, and my shaving stuff, toothbrush, toothpaste, deoderant is in the toiletry bag in the bathroom.”
Harley went and retrieved both items and helped Gus get into the wheelchair. But she couldn’t quite figure out how to push Gus, carry his stuff, and hold onto Zach and Jude all at the same time. Fortunately, her older son solved the dilemma for her.
“Mommy…can me and Jude with Gus in the wheelchair?” asked Zach.
“Ummmm….if it is ok with Gus, then it is ok with me.”
“Gus, Gus, please” both boys begged.
“Of course guys, let me help you up.”
So with Zach and Jude on Gus’s lap, Harley grabbed Gus’s bags and her purse and pushed her three guys out of the hospital to the car followed by an orderly to pick up the wheelchair. After putting Zach and Jude into their car seats and helping Gus into the front passenger seat, Harley put the key in the ignition, cranked it, but didn’t take the car out of park. Instead, she reached over for Gus’s hand and held it. In that moment, Gus and Harley were both feeling very strong and courageous and ready to tackle their biggest obstacle yet. And then, Harley took the car out of park and headed for home.
 
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