Bspacewiz2
Death Tot Commander
Posts: 83
(10/10/05 8:57 pm)
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 On the Road with Bspace and Boobu, EP I: The Original Story!
NOTE TO READERS: This is a transcript from the original screen captures I did on the boards of Boobu's and my FIRST adventure...which was originally started, Feb. 1st, 2005.
INT. BOOBU'S PAD-MORNING
*COUNT BOOBU snuggles up next to his doll version of Palpatine. He mumbles in his sleep about plots to take over the Universe.*
*The door to Boobu's bedroom is BLASTED open by the familiar sound of a Tater Tot energy gun. Boobu awakens with a jolt.*
Boobu: What the Hell?!
*Bspace strolls into the room, spinning a gun around his finger and whistling duel of the fates.*
Bspace: Rise and shine Boobu ole' buddy!
Boobu: Bspace!!! how did you get in here??!! My pet rancor, Muffin, was guarding the entrance!! 
Bspace: Muffin is chomping down on a gammorean snack I saved for her!
Boobu: Her favorite treat!!!
Bspace: yeah I know what the ladies like 
Boobu: Grah! what are you doing here anyway?  Today's the day where I take a break from being a megolamaniac so I can get some sleep!
Bspace: You mean you don't get any sleep all week long, save for today?
Boobu:  IT'S TRUE!!!!
Bspace: oh, uh, well sorry...but today is the day we were gonna go out driving, remember? 
Boobu: Really? Lemme check my datapad....
*Boobu takes out a datapad, his daily planner and looks up the activities he had planned. Going on the road with Bspace is seen on a heading thats dated for this very day.*
Boobu: Argh!! He's right...allright B...take me to your speeder.
Bspace: Righto!!!
EXT. LANDING PAD-DAY
*Bspace and Boobu stand before an extravegant looking red speeder, styled with sleek designs, an impressive engine, and a spanking sound system.*
Boobu: You came in that thing? Your braver than I thought!
Bspace: Very funny. Normally I don't let anyone drive this thing, but since your my good buddy, I'll make an exception!
Boobu: Aw...thats cute...BUT IT'S...
*Bspace shoves Boobu into the drivers' side before he can finish his sentence*
Bspace: Allright, now start her up!
Boobu:  uh....how?
Bspace: Like this!!!!!
*Bspace smashes his foot on Boobu's boot, and forces his hand to turn the key. The speeder ROARS to life*
Boobu: HOLY POODOO!!!!
Bspace: Now drive like the force flows!!!
*Boobu steps on the gas hard, causing the speeder to skid slightly from side to side before it launches into a full fledged takeoff*
*The speeder zooms around the desert landscape of Tatooine at insane speeds, barely dodging the rocky obstacles that form the landscape*
Boobu: Bspace, how do you stop this crazy thing?!?!
Bspace: Forget stopping, lets go faster!!!!! Push that BIG RED BUTTON!
Boobu: I don't want to!!! *Cries*
Bspace: push it boobu!!!! IT IS YOUR DESTINY!!
*Boobu fearfully pushes the red button*
*The speeder makes the jump into Hyperspace*
EXT. HYPERSPACE-CONTINUOUS
*Bspace's monster of a speeder jets across the stars. Both he and Boobu can barely hold onto their seats due to the incredible velocity at which they are travelling at.*
Boobu: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!!!!!
Bspace: UTTTTIIIINNNNIIII!!!!!!!
*Suddenly the speeder exits out into normal space. The unexpected stop throws both Boobu and Bspace up against the dashboard, knocking them out for a few seconds*
*Bspace comes around first, followed by Boobu*
Bspace: WOW!!!!! That was cool! No one's been able to make this thing go that fast before! You must have the magic touch boobu!!
*Bspace looks at Boobu who is a bit dazed*
Boobu: Nappy time already, Master?
*Boobu passes out again*
*Bspace shakes boobu's shoulder*
Bspace: Aw come on Boobu!! You can't nap now! We haven't even gotten around to learning you about high speed maneuvering!
*The speeder jerks backwards. Bspace looks over the backseat to see the sight of a thousand terrible things headed their way; Trade Federation fighters and donut star ships*
Bspace: !!!!!
*Bspace pushes Boobu out of the driver's seat and tries to get the speeder going. An empty reading on the speeder's fuel cells prevent a quick escape*
Bspace*looking at audience*: I think you know what I'm going to say  ......I HAVE A BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS!!
INT. TRADE FEDERATION STARSHIP
*The speeder is pulled into the docking bay...Tens of battle droids and super battle droids surround the speeder, weapons locked*
*Boobu slowly wakes up again. He see's Bspace hiding under the passenger seat*
Boobu: Did we stop?
Bspace: uh..yousa mighten be sayin dat.
Boobu:  Why the hell are you talking like a Gungan?!??!
*Boobu glances over his shoulder and sees the welcoming committee outside of their speeder*
Boobu: HOLY CRAP!!!
*Boobu hides under the driver's seat*
Boobu: How did we end up in this mess??
Bspace: Boobu! your the dark lord of the silliness! Can't you use your silly sith powers to get us out of this mess?
Boobu: I told you this is the day I get my beauty sleep didn't I? Besids......I don't have my lightsaber...
Bspace: You are the WORST SITH EVER!
Boobu: ah go choke on some poodoo you freakin jawa
FEMALE VOICE (O.S): Get out of the speeder now boys!
Bspace: I know that voice from anywhere
*Bspace and Boobu peek their heads from over the speeder. They see a maniacal middle aged woman wearing black leather.
Bspace: Darth Mary! Only you could be so bold!
Boobu: Mary?! Uh oh...
Bspace: uh oh? Boobu, what did you do to Mary 
Boobu: I kinda put some kohuuns in her bedsheets some night last week...
Bspace: !!!
Boobu: It was just a silly prank!
INT. DETENTION CELL
*Bspace and Boobu are both imprisioned in an energy cell like the one Obi Wan was in, in AOTC*
Bspace: A silly prank huh?
*Mary laughs insanely*
Mary: and now boys, you shall have a small taste of the horrors that I will inflict on you. You can thank Boobu for this, Bspace.
Bspace: Mary I don't get it. How did you find us in the middle of space? AND WHY THE HECK ARE YOU TORTURING ME ALONG SIDE THIS LOSER!!!
Boobu: HEY!!
Mary: Number 1, I placed a small homing device on Boobu's helmet. Number 2, you promised me a joyride in your new speeder! And now you've given that prize to Boobu! You've Betrayed me!!
Bspace: You think torturing me is the answer?
Boobu: Hell, its what I'd do!
Mary: Indeed...so long boys 
*Mary leaves, laughing all the way. As soon as she leaves, two Ewoks enter in her place
Bspace&Boobu: HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!
*The Ewoks slowly, overdramatically approach Boobu and Bspace with nasty looking weapons in their hands*
Bspace: BOOBU!! Please tell me you can get us outta here!!
Boobu: That depends...You wouldn't happen to have a remote control device to operate your speeder automatically, would you?
Bspace: I do...its right...hey wait! How did you conviently figure out I had a device like that?
Boobu: I AM the dark lord of the silliness ya know
Bspace: 
Bspace: Its in my pocket, but I can't reach it from here!
Boobu: That's where the force comes in, my friend!
*Boobu's hand vibrates. The Force theme suddenly blares in the background as the remote control to the speeder levitates out of Bspace's pocket and towards Boobu's hand.*
Bspace: Your doing it boobu!! Keep it up!!
*The Force theme swells in its brilliance...until the remote smacks Boobu in the face*
Boobu: owww!!!!
Bspace: You freakin moron!!
*The Ewoks smash the device with their sticks and stones*
*suddenly the remote starts to pulsate with light*
Boobu: Whats going on?
Bspace: Oh, I built a thermal detonator into the device incase any idiots tried to smash it.
Boobu:....and you call me a freakin moron
*The remote blows up, enveloping the room in a huge explosion*
*The explosion sets off the ship's emergency alarms*
Mary: Find out where that explosion came from! I am not missing today's episode of Oprah!
*A neimodian sitting next to Darth Mary examines the situation*
Neimodian: There'ah seems'ah to beah problem in thee detention centah!
Mary: Send some droidikas down there at once!
*The smoke starts to clear in the detention cell*
*Bspace and Boobu's clothing is somewhat charred*
Boobu*coughing*: anyone alive?
Bspace*coughing*: thats debatable...
Boobu: WHY DOES EVERYONE SAY THAT?!?!!
Bspace: Aw who cares! Hey look, we're free of our manicals! lets get out of here!
Boobu: Thats the FIRST good idea you've had all day!
*Bspace and Boobu run out of their rooms and come face to face with a pair of droidikas*
Boobu: On second thought, staying in the cell is sounding like a really good idea now
*The droidikas open fire, Bspace and Boobu dodge the blasts, matrix style.*
*The droidikas stop firing and look at each other, seeming to be surprised*
*Bspace and Boobu turn and look at each other*
Bspace/Boobu*Like neo*: Whoa..
*Boobu grabs Bspace by the collar of his robes and takes off in a flash, using the force to speed himself up. The droidikas roll after them*
Bspace: I thought you said you couldnt' use the force! That you weren't rested enough!
Boobu: Meh, the writer of this story is too lazy to explain it anyway. So just shut up and hang on
INT. TRADE FEDERATION SHIP
*Bspace and Boobu make it back to the hangar. They find their speeder and heads toward it*
Voice*in huttese*: Going somewhere Bspace?
*Boobu and Bspace turn around to see a Rodian with a rather large hand cannon pointed their way*
Bspace: Yes Hawkins, I was just on my way to see your boss. Tell Obi that I've got "his" money.
Hawkins: Obi's through with you! He doesn't particularly care for smugglers who abandon their speeders at the first sign of...
*Bspace takes out one of his tater tot blasters and blows Hawkins away before he has a chance to get a shot off.*
Boobu: whad you do that for?!?!
Bspace: Meh, its the special edition. Go watch the original version if you want to see Hawkins shoot first
EXT. SPACE
*Bspace and Boobu take off in the speeder, Trade Federation battleships trailing behind them*
Boobu: How nice..they refueld this thing for us!
Bspace: Maybe Mary knew we would get away?
Boobu: Hell no! Its that lazy writer at work again! Who hired this nut?!
(Author's intrusion: Shut up Boobu! Go steal a freakin picnic basket with Yogi!)
*Bspace and Boobu suddenly find themselves in the sight of an asteroid field looming before them*
*Bspace pops in the star wars trilogy soundtrack and plays "The Asteroid Field" from ESB*
Boobu:
Bspace: We needed something funky to drive to!
*The speeder weaves and bobs in and out of asteroids big and small. The Trade Federation fighters crash and smash against the asteroids in the process*
Bspace: Lets land in one of those tunnels! We can take cover there!
Boobu: And get eaten by a giant space slug? I don't think so!
Bspace: You can't make the jump to lightspeed in this asteroid field!
Boobu: thats what you think!
*Boobu presses the BIG RED BUTTON...and the speeder makes the jump to hyperspace, and the results of which causes a supernova that takes out everything in the local star system*
Have Bspace and Boobu committed suicide? Is Darth Mary dead with the supernova? Will this Story ever come to a conclusion?
EXT. UNKNOWN SPACE
*A Space Shuttle is seen orbiting a blue/green planet. Two Astronauts do routine maitenince work on an exposed piece of circuitry on the shuttle's hull*
Astronaut 1: You think we're alone in the universe Ben?
Astronaut 2: Definately George. If there was any intellegent life out there, it would have shown itself by now
George: thats true..
*The explosion of a vehicle exiting hyperspace sounds off some distant miles in the distant stars. The speeder itself comes roaring by the space shuttle, narrowly missing it*
George: Ben..
Ben: Before you say anything George, no I wouldn't call that intellegent life. The ability to drive does not make one intellegent.
George: Good point...
EXT. PARK-DAY
*Bspace and Boobu lay on the ground, unconcious, under a tree. People who walk past them make cruel statements about them being star wars geeks*
*Boobu awakens first, shaking off the effects of his slumber*
Boobu: Man, note to self, listen to Princess Leia's advice.
*Boobu takes a look around at his location and the people pointing and laughing in his direction*
Boobu: what the?! where the hell are we?!?!
*A MAN and his family come walking by Bspace and Boobu*
Man: Hey buddy, shouldn't you be in line or something?
Boobu: in line? for what??
Child: STAR WARS!!! STAR WARS IS COMING OUT AT MIDNIGHT!!!
Boobu: Star what?
Man: oh come on buddy. Don't tell me you dress up like that and you haven't heard of Star Wars. Today's May 18th! Revenge of the Sith is playing at midnight at a few of the theaters in town. The lines are long so you better get crackin!
Boobu: oooooooooookaaaayyy...
*The man and his family finally leave. Boobu turns to Bspace and whacks him upside the head*
Bspace: AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! WHAT'D YA DO THAT FOR??!!
Boobu: Wake up! We're on some alien world, in a galaxy far far away from the outer rim.
Bspace: We are?
Boobu: Just take a look at the way all the people are dressed. And there's no non-human lifeforms in sight!
*A pair of cute young women come walking by, quickly catching Bspace and Boobu's attention*
Bspace: And this is a bad thing?
Boobu: No, my jawa friend, it is not!
EXT. CITY-DAY
*Bspace and Boobu take a walk out on the town. Bspace's stomach begins to growl*
Bspace: man I'm hungry...Lets stop and get some food!
Boobu: Fair enough, but we should really find our speeder afterwords...
Bspace: sure thing! but first...FOOD!
INT. RESTURAUNT-DAY
*Bspace and Boobu enter to a scene buzzing with activity*
*An extremely cute waitress notices their arrival and go over to them*
Waitress: Hey nice costumes!!
Bspace: Thanks! My mommy made it for me!
*The waitress giggles...Boobu nudges Bspace on the shoulder*
Boobu: real smooth B...
Waitress: so, party of 2?
Boobu: Yes. It is our destiny.
Waitress*smiling*: Okay guys, this way
*The waitress leads Bspace and Boobu to a table by a window*
Waitress: My name's Laura, I'll be your waitress today. Just look at the menu's and I'll be back in a minute to take your orders.
*Laura goes off to another part of the resturaunt. Bspace and Boobu analyze her thoroughly as she leaves. Boobu looks at Bspace, who's still staring off into the distance*
Boobu: And just what were you looking at?
Bspace: Nothing! What were YOU looking at?
Boobu: Lets just take a look at the menu
*As they look at the menu, a shadowy figure stares at Bspace and Boobu from the shadows, near the rear of the resturaunt*
*Boobu notices the figure's stare and takes a peek at him out of the corners of his optical sensors.*
Bspace: Boobu, I think we may have a problem here...
Boobu*still looking away*: Yeah?
Bspace: Um...I can't read these alien letters on the menu.
Boobu: nevermind that...This fellow over here to the rear of us has done nothing but stare at us ever since we got here...
*The shadowy figure smokes a fat cigar, briefly illuminating his eyes*
*Laura comes back*
Laura: So guys, ready to order?
Boobu: Just a minute...Do you know who that shadowy looking guy is?
*Laura turns and looks at the figure and turns a bit pale*
Laura: That guy is one of them rangers. Always wandering the wilds, those guys do. I don't know what his right name is, but around here...people call him Aragorn...
Bspace: Aragorn...
Laura: that what I said...so guys, what are you going to have today?
Bspace: uhhh....
Boobu: we're in the mood for just about anything...so uh..surprise us!
Laura: fair enough...anything to drink?
Boobu: Corellian Ale
Bspace: Jawa Juice!
Laura:  You guys are such nerds. be right back
*Laura leaves and two menacing looking guys arrive in her place*
Guy 1: Hey nerds
*Bspace and Boobu turn around*
Guy 1: My friend here, he doesn't like you
Bspace: well we're sorry!
Boobu: we are?
Guy 1: I don't like you either! You just watch yourself. We're TREKKIES!
Bspace: !!!!!
Boobu*looking at Bspace*: We already know where this is heading
Bspace: your not gonna...
Boobu: Oh yeah...
*Boobu reaches for his lightsaber, but feels nothing*
Boobu: Crap! Forgot my lightsaber!
*One of the guys picks up Bspace and throws him out the window*
Boobu: HOLY CRAP!! I give B a 10 for that landing!!!
*The Trekkies turn their sights on Boobu. Boobu shocks the crap out of them with tickle lightning*
*A hand grabs Boobu's shoulder*
Voice: You draw far too much attention to yourself Mr. Sithy.
*The hand pulls Boobu into the shadows*
EXT. FOREST-DAY
*Boobu falls flat on his face. He sees Bspace sitting next to him*
Boobu: How did you get here?
Bspace: GRAH!! NOBODY TOSSES ME!!!
Boobu: Bspace?!
Bspace: oh sorry...well some hand pulled me here like you.
Voice: Indeed.
*Bspace and Boobu lay their eyes on their captor*
Man: That is some power you have there.
Boobu: Uh, who the hell are you?
Man: I can make people laugh if I wish, But to force it out of them with lightning...that is a rare gift.
Bspace: dude, you just totally dodged the question!
Man: Are you two frightened?
Bspace: Nope.
Boobu: Not in the slightest.
Man: well...uh...you should be! I know why you've come
Boobu: You do? Because I have no idea what this place is, where we are, or who the hell you are! I can only blame Bspace for offering me to drive his speeder...stupid...stupid B.
Bspace:
Man: You two going to help me sneak into the theater tonight to see Revenge of the Sith.
Bspace: And why should we do that?
Man: Because I have your speeder.
Bspace/Boobu: !!!!
EXT. MOVIE THEATER-NIGHT
*The lines are packed with hundreds of people, eagarly awaiting to see a certain movie*
*Bspace, Boobu and Aragorn peek their heads around the side of the building*
Aragorn: Okay, the lines are filled to capacity, as I expected. Now, do you two remember the plan?
Boobu: I use the force to trick the guard into letting you get in through the back, and Bspace here pretends to be your son...wait...why is that again?
Aragorn: Because he's my ticket in if the guards are too strong minded. No one can resist the sad expression of a child!
Bspace: But no one can see my face...
Aragorn: So take your hood off.
Bspace: That's like asking me to take off my head and kick it like a football.
Boobu: Can we get on with this already! I'm very anxious to leave.
Aragorn: Go for it.
*Bspace, Boobu and Aragorn head to the rear of the theater. Two stormtroopers block the way. One of the troopers, TK-1771, is first to catch sight of the silly trio.*
TK-1771: Hold it right there, citizen!
Boobu*waving hand*: You want to let us through.
TK-1771: No. No, I don't.
Boobu: Uhhhh.... will a bribe of credits do fine?
TK-1771: No, they won't.
Boobu: Credits WILL do fine...
*TK raises his blaster to Boobu's head*
TK-1771: You had just better turn around.
Bspace: Time for plan B!
*Bspace reveals Puss in Boots from Shrek 2*
TK-1771: Awwww.....
*The kitten then leaps onto TK's face, claws extended. TK blasts the kitten to a million pieces.
TK-1771: Nice try, but...
*TK sees the trio gone and the back door wide open
TK-1771: Craptacular...
INT. MOVIE THEATER-NIGHT
*The silly trio run through the theater's hallways.
Aragorn: Hurry! The first showing starts in a few minutes!
*The trio round a corner...and come face to face with a group of well armed stormtroopers*
Stormtrooper: It's Them!! BLAST THEM!
*Bspace whips out his tater tot blasters and plugs the stormy with an energy blast. The rest of the stormies take off and B jets after them*
Bspace: Get to the theater!!!
Boobu: Where are you going?! Come back!!
Aragorn: He's a deadman, sithy...
Boobu: Yep.
*Bspace has the troopers on the run. He rounds another corner...and enters a theater packed with fans. The lights and the 20th Century Fox logo comes up as well as the music. The fans cheer.*
*Bspace stops dead in his tracks, looking at what's being shown on the big screen*
INT. THEATER-LATER
*The Star Wars ending credits come up. The fans cheer and applaud...some are even in tears*
Boobu: Holy....Crap...
Aragorn: It was everything I could have dreamed it would be! *tears of joy*
*On the other side of the theater, B is still frozen in stance*
Bspace: ....
EXT. THEATER-NIGHT
*Boobu and Aragorn meet up with Bspace. All 3 appear to be at a loss of words*
Aragorn: Well guys, thanks for your help. In exchange for your assistance, I'm going to have your @$$es thrown into an Imperial Detention Center!
Bspace&Boobu: WHAT!!!!!
*A bright flood light shines down on the B boys. Above them, Stormtroopers of every kind and Imperial Walkers point their guns down at them*
Aragorn: Thats right, I'm an Imperial Agent, working to ferrit out people looking to sneak into theaters on opening priemiers. And now that you've fallen into my little trap, I'm throwing the book at you!!!
*A big book is thrown at Bspace and Boobu who are still too shocked for words*
Boobu: Bspace...
Bspace: Yeah...
Boobu: Remind me to kill you when we get out...
Bspace: Duly noted...
*Bspace and Boobu are then hauled off begin the long voyage to the Imperial Detention Center*
THE END!...........for now
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